Family dynamics, especially parent and child, have a long-lasting impact on how your characters are formed. You don’t have to write a family saga to utilize this insight. It will shape who your character becomes as an adult. It can play a big part in a young adult story world. Even in Science Fiction or Dystopian futures, human traits remain. Childhoods can twist and destroy. A good family can make your hero more lovable and a motivated hero. Mix a character with a good childhood without to give them different world views and definitions of family. Sibling rivalry can be a factor. Who did the parent love more? Who did they connect with? Who did they clash with the most? There are many opportunities to infuse conflict in your plot with parents and children. You can mix parents with different styles. You can craft a complex family dynamic based on their temperaments and needs. As always with any of the traits, you can make them benevolent or malevolent.
The sixteen profiles can be either male or female. I alternated he and she. The character can be a father, mother, grandparent, aunt, uncle, foster family, or other primary caregiver.
This post will focus on the mannequin ARDEN.
Arden is a stable parent. He wants to be admired for his integrity and hard work. He expects his children to behave and to excel. He rejects dependence, messiness, or dawdling. He can’t handle an intuitive, dreamy child. He can’t relax and just go with the flow. He hates changes in schedule. He is a firm disciplinarian and has no trouble with confrontation. He suppresses his displeasure until a core value is violated. Then he erupts and dishes out criticism, but can’t take it. He is hypercritical and controlling when stressed. He will overlook a transgression once, but it better not be repeated. Arden won’t tolerate challenges to his authority. He is a fierce advocate for his children and will defend them against outsiders in public. In private, his unrealistic expectations and criticism can be harmful. On the positive side, he will be a stable, steadying leader of a family.
Natural matches: Arden is most compatible with Arden, Lee, Nevada, Kelly, and Francis. Arden struggle most with Shelby.
ARDEN/WYNN
As a child, a Wynn is easy to please and seeks approval. She prefers clear consistent rules and a secure routine but can’t handle suffocating attention. Arden is the perfect parent in that respect. Arden can be a bit strict and unyielding. There is potential for misunderstandings if Wynn is unfairly punished or accused. When stressed, Wynn suffers silently. Both will withhold negative feelings until they erupt. The two could misunderstand each other for a lifetime until a catalyst releases their emotions.
ARDEN/FRANCIS
As a child Francis needs order, structure, calm, and a predictable schedule. Arden provides that. Francis struggles with overly emotional people. He is meticulous and puts schoolwork before play and Arden appreciates that. Francis isn’t comfortable with new people and situations and clings to close friends. However, Francis enjoys situations where he can show off his competence and Arden will cheer him on. If belittled, Francis sinks into low self-esteem. He can become rigid in the face of uncertainty and can be a bully. Arden could be a bully and they could feed each other in that regard if Arden is more controlling and critical than Francis can handle. If things are pretty neutral, Francis will be Arden’s favorite child because he doesn’t cause problems.
ARDEN/NEVADA
Nevada needs structure, security and personal attention. If he doesn’t get it, he becomes clingy. He becomes resentful and angry if he doesn't get the praise he seeks. Arden will provide the structure but isn’t free with praise. Nevada does what he is expected to do. He follows the rules if fair and reasonable. He speaks out against unfairness. He is furious when other people break the rules. So in that regard, he is compatible with Arden. However, Nevada will turn against his parents if he perceives that they let him down. He becomes willfully obstinate if violated and that can create a war. Nevada struggles to conform to new situations, so as long as his parents keep his life calm, he is fine. If they are forced to move around for work etc. he can turn into a problem child. If Nevada becomes a problem, Arden will become a harsh taskmaster, pushing Nevada to leave the family behind.
ARDEN/ARDEN
Arden is an active toddler. He likes to experiment and needs constant activity and change. He grows sullen and depressed if deprived of opportunities. He is curious and likes to disassemble things. He is eager to share his findings. He can resort to acting up to get attention or break up the monotony. This will not make parent Arden happy, even though he was the same as a child. Arden isn’t a snuggler. He hates standing still and that can be exhausting. Arden wants to impress and wants to earn those trophies and badges. He wants to excel. Parent Arden will be there rooting him on but may not agree with his methods. They could become best buddies or total enemies.
ARDEN/BLAIR
Blair needs love and nurturing. Absent, inattentive or busy caregivers make her feel lost. Arden isn’t good with personal attention. He expects his children to be self sufficient and won’t appreciate a clinging child. Blair needs a solid foundation from which to flit, which seems contradictory to other people. Arden provides the solid foundation but will object to the flitting. Blair is pleasant and kind and nurturing toward others. She makes special gifts. Blair is quiet and plays by herself, inventing her own world. She is artistic and highly sensitive, a daydreamer. She rebels if restricted and resists change. Since Arden is all about peace and self-control, Blair could drive him crazy.
ARDEN/DALLAS
Dallas is a restless child. She is suffocated by restrictions or cloying caregivers. She isn’t a cuddler. She is a dangerous loose cannon and will try anything. Her attention is fleeting. She doesn’t do anything long enough to master it. She will drive Arden quite mad. Dallas needs to be corralled and Arden may do so to the point of suffocation. Dallas is a ringleader of her siblings or in school. She hates being stuck at a desk listening to other people talk. She forgets to do what she is supposed to. If Arden tries too hard to manage Dallas, she becomes a rebellious wild child. Sparks will fly between these two.
ARDEN/HADLEY
Hadley is an easy baby. She needs calm, personalized attention. Busy or aggressive parents make her anxious and fretful. In that regard, Arden is stable but not overly nurturing. Hadley is agreeable and enthusiastic. She wants to try everything once but quickly drops it. Arden will be frustrated by this. Dallas wants to be seen and heard and offers deep insights. She shuts down in the face of criticism and everything is criticism. So when Arden attempts to direct her, Dallas will rebel. Dallas is easily led and hates leaving friends even though her friendships tend to be fluid. Arden will find her perplexing and she will find him stiff and dull. Dallas might rile him up to get a reaction. It won’t go well.
ARDEN/SHELBY
Shelby is a quiet baby with a low threshold for excitement. She needs calm and consistent nurturing. Too much handling, moving around, and chaos make her cranky. She cries to escape the torture when caregivers shake her up and show her off. Arden is perfect for her in that regard. Shelby likes playing by herself, with her toys, or with her imaginary friends. She likes to daydream and doodle. Shelby is reserved around new people and bonds with a best friend. She can be a loner. She hates teams and groups and is highly sensitive to criticism. She turns her pain inward. Arden may be confused by this changeling. He may push her to do more and be better. She will be hurt by the slightest criticism. Shelby may never feel good enough for Arden. Both of them suppress until they blow, so a conflagration could occur with the right trigger. They could hurt each other without realizing it and drift apart.
ARDEN/JOSS
Joss is a quiet but busy child. He is a fearless daredevil. He accepts structure and concrete rules but needs flexibility. He asks permission but finds a way around it if told “no.” He grows bored when options are limited. Arden will appreciate him in most respects, but Joss might become too much for him to handle. Joss likes to take things apart to see how they work, but doesn’t tell anyone what he learns. He gets lost in his hobbies. Joss is a good student, but chafes at rote learning. He gets in trouble for not paying attention or sitting still. Arden will be frustrated by Joss’s inability to fall in line. His line. Joss tries harder to control his world if it spirals out of control. Arden is a secure structured parent, so only life changing turbulence is likely to affect them both. If Arden is too controlling, he may never see Joss again once he leaves home.
ARDEN/KELLY
Kelly is a freedom-loving, active, and cranky baby. If his caregivers crave a consistent schedule, they are out of luck. He transplants easily. Kelly can't sit still and play alone. He craves attention and creates chaos to get it. He won't abide by rules or conform. He will challenge Arden from day one and make his life chaotic. Arden will try to make him behave the way he wants him too. It won’t work. Kelly collects friends and needs to be on the move. He loves lavish celebrations. He is a ringleader of mischief. He needs firm hand, not an iron fist. And Arden can be an iron fist. Kelly can be self-destructive if thwarted. He learns how to manipulate early and can become a bully. Kelly won’t easily cow Arden but they are likely in for a lifetime of misunderstandings and frustrations.
ARDEN/GREER
Greer is a happy, easy going child who likes to explore and plays happily alone. He needs routine and safety and Arden supplies it. He asks odd challenging questions and enjoys fantasy, mystery, inventing, and thinking. Arden might not understand his child, but since he isn’t causing problems, he will be fondly tolerant. Greer can’t handle chaos and hates being fussed over or the center of attention. Arden is just the calm stable parent he needs. Greer doubts himself and takes criticism hard, but Arden isn’t likely to criticize much. They don’t have a lot to clash over. They should muddle along fairly well together even if they have nothing in common.
ARDEN/TAYLOR
Taylor needs peace and calm. Chaotic and unpredictable caregivers make her anxious. Overprotective parents suffocate her. Absent or busy caregivers allow her to spiral out of control. Arden is stable and provides the calm she needs. Taylor is friendly and values harmony. Pleasing others makes her happy. Arden will appreciate her efforts. Taylor will take charge of her siblings and the playroom. Arden will probably respect that too. Taylor is hurt if she senses disapproval or if her efforts are rejected. Arden might not give her the appreciation and recognition she needs. He provides and that should be enough. He won’t understand what she needs. They can hurt each other in that regard. Taylor overextends herself by trying to play with everyone and must be reined in. Arden has no problem defining boundaries. Taylor may not respect them. For the most part, they may not have much conflict in the day to day, but emotional misunderstandings are a given. If Taylor tries to push things too far, Arden may become distant and critical.
ARDEN/CAM
Cam is a quiet, low maintenance child. He won’t ask for anything, even for what he needs. He is good because it’s important to be good not to please others. He expects everyone else to be good too: caregivers, siblings, teachers, and friends. A chaotic or highly dysfunctional family pushes him further inside his shell. Arden provides stability and calm. Cam spends a lot of time daydreaming and thinking. Though his questioning of authority and probing questions make Arden frustrated. Cam is self-regulating and responsible. He develops his own belief system and does not conform to what others believe. That may be a problem for traditional Arden. As Arden criticizes, Cam withdraws to protect. They could keep each other at an arm’s distance their whole lives, never really understanding each other.
ARDEN/MORGAN
Morgan is a lively baby. He walks, talks, and gets into everything early. He might do them all a little differently. Arden who expects everything to happen on time and in the right way is frustrated. Morgan has a lively questioning mind. He takes risks and outwits dim caregivers, teachers, or other authority figures. Arden will become a warden to try to keep him in line. Morgan likes creative projects and follows his unique interests wherever they lead. His penchant for invention is evident early on. Arden might respect his skill but not his choices. Morgan is outgoing. He likes to orchestrate activities, assign roles, oversee the progress, and is irritated when he doesn't get his way. Arden isn’t likely to give him free reign. Morgan doesn’t like group activities but can be a clown in social situations and won’t appreciate the parties or holiday fuss. He is likely to take apart his toys or utilize them in interesting ways. Arden will not be happy that Morgan is wasting money that way. They are likely to have an uneasy relationship and if Morgan becomes a wild child, Arden may turn away from him entirely.
ARDEN/LEE
Lee is a high-demand baby. If placed with absent or self-absorbed caregivers, she screams until someone pays attention to her. She proves exhausting to the most attentive caregiver and Arden isn’t overly attentive. Lee knows her own mind from the day she can talk and tells you what she wants and does not want. If Arden has different plans and goals for Lee, she is met with stubborn resistance. Lee excels at whatever she chooses to participate in. She is in competition with herself not others, but they might not realize it. Arden will appreciate her skill. Lee could triangulate her parents and become daddy’s darling, seeing her mother as competition. Lee is a leader on the playground and becomes the enemy of anyone who doesn’t follow along. She is the quintessential queen bee. As long as Lee isn’t challenging his authority, Arden will be okay with that. To caregivers with Lee’s temperament, Lee is the perfect child. To rigid caregivers, she is a pain. To less intrepid caregivers, she scares them a little.
ARDEN/RIVER
River is a quiet baby. She is content to observe the world. A busy, aggressive, or outgoing caregiver makes her cry. She needs peace and quiet to thrive. She lives in a dream world most of the time. Arden’s calm and stability will suit her well. If Arden attempts to drag her to play groups or to the playground, River will go kicking and screaming. River has one or two friends. Her emotional skin is thin and any criticism lowers her self-esteem. If she does not rise to Arden’s expectations, she may become depressed. River naturally sees the world as treacherous and trust is vital. She hates violence and discord and needs peace and continuity. Arden’s calm approach to life can provide River with a safe haven. However, Arden could easily overpower and suffocate River with his expectations. River will just go deeper inside. Arden may not know what to do with this changeling and any criticism will hurt River. Arden may not notice his child’s pain and distress until it is too late.
Next week, we will introduce BLAIR.
If you want to learn more, you can check out Mastering Character Development and the
